Midsummer nightmare update

A while back I was having a little anxiety attack about what to wear to an upcoming function. Of course if you spend your entire day obsessing over what to wear & start sweating and suddenly start talking like your some foreign daffy duck then it MIGHT classify as more than a "little" anxiety. Of course, I'm no expert so this could classify as total rational behavior. Moving on.... I was starting to feel "sad" that I didn't have the perfect spring outfit. Well.. here I am on vacation with my 5 kiddos sans my spouse (yeah this experience will be a blog entry all its own!) & we decide to go to the store to find some shoes. So while my children are arguing about who has picked out the best shoes I decide to sneak out the back door.. I mean I decide to check out the gold star clearance section for my size. As I started down the aisle I thought I heard harps playing. I glanced at the pink box and realized I found the most perfect shoes on the planet. I mean if you were to see these shoes you would say THOSE SCREAM KIM. Of course they could also scream "Kim is so going to fall on her fat ass while wearing those shoes, but they are adorable just like her!" Bottom line.. I have the shoes now I have to find an outfit to go with them. Of course when I showed my dad my miracle find he muttered something about street corners... Hey, he's a guy so what does he know anyways...

Midsummer Nightmare

Ok so I need to find a "Spring" dress.
If any of you who really know me... then you know this is going to be hard.

I was shopping with my friend SV this weekend and she found a dress for me. When I saw it I absolutely LOVED it. The only problem was it is a size 16!!
Hello?? 16?? Yeah, not there yet.

So SV says... "Here is one your size. Get this one!"
I grabbed it and bought it.

When I got home I thought..... QUICK grab the fat sucker one piece!
I put it on and the leopard wacoal bra that makes my boobs look fab!

It FIT!!

From the front... FABULOUS!
From the back... BIG ASS PINK FLOWER ASS, but looks good!
From the sides... 2 pigs fighting under a blanket... yup that sums it up!

So it looks like I am back to the drawing board, unless I exercise NON STOP.
Oh yeah right, canceled Y membership.

SHIT!