Tuesday, September 17, 2013

On my knees....

Today I am on my knees begging for some good days.
 
h had a backwards slide yesterday.
Even though I feel sometimes like I am looking for "something/anything" to blame besides my son... I really think the culprit is Red 40.
You see, after about an hour after we got home h admitted he ate 2 bowls of froot loops at around 2:30 in the morning.
WTF!!!
 
Now, you might say its a coincidence but I no longer do.
I put that fucking box of cereal in the trash!
I didn't even know I had it...
 
So today I dedicate the song Perfect by Pink to h.
I never realized how the words seem to fit my life.
To me h is perfect.
To h, he feels like he is nothing.
 
Oh please join me on bended knee... We need it now before we slide into our pattern from last year.
Please let today be a good day....
  
Made a wrong turn, once or twice
Dug my way out, blood and fire
Bad decisions, that's alright
Welcome to my silly life
 
Mistreated, misplaced, misunderstood
Miss, no way it's all good, it didn't slow me down
Mistaken, always second guessing
Underestimated, look, I'm still around
 
Pretty, pretty please, don't you ever, ever feel
Like you're less than, Fuckin' perfect
Pretty, pretty please, if you ever, ever feel
Like you're nothing you are fuckin' perfect to me
 
You're so mean when you talk
About yourself, you are wrong
Change the voices in your head
Make them like you instead
 
So complicated, look how big you'll make it
Filled with so much hatred, such a tired game
 It's enough, I've done all I can think of
Chased down all my demons, see you do the same
 
Pretty, pretty please, don't you ever, ever feel
Like you're less than, less than perfect
Pretty, pretty please, if you ever, ever feel
Like you're nothing, you are perfect to me
 
The whole world stares while I swallow the fear
The only thing I should be drinking is an ice cold beer
So cool in lying and we tried, tried, tried
But we try too hard, it's a waste of my time
 
Done looking for the critics 'cause they're everywhere
They don't like my jeans, they don't get my hair
Strange ourselves and we do it all the time
Why do we do that? Why do I do that? Why do I do that?
 
Ooh, pretty, pretty, pretty
Pretty, pretty please, don't you ever, ever feel
Like you're less than, less than perfect
Pretty, pretty please, if you ever, ever feel

 Like you're nothing, you are perfect to me
You are perfect to me
You're perfect, you're perfect to me

Pretty, pretty please if you ever, ever feel
Like you're less than, less than perfect
Pretty, pretty please if you ever, ever feel
Like you're nothing, you are perfect to me
 
I'm making a promise right now. If I find out that h's critics are the ones that are suppose to be helping him, I will not be held responsible for my actions! That is a PROMISE!! You fuck with my kid, you fuck with me! Get your head out of your sorry ass and help my kid before I get really desperate!! 

 
 
 


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